


Reflections in His Mind

by uxseven (ignemferam)



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-19
Updated: 2012-10-19
Packaged: 2017-11-16 15:36:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,457
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/541063
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ignemferam/pseuds/uxseven
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Danny had a few surprising revelations regarding himself thoughout his life. Him being clueless was the least expected. Some detective he was!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Reflections in His Mind

**Author's Note:**

> **Disclaimer:** The characters are not mine and I do not make profits of any sort by writing what my active imagination has come up with.
> 
>  **Spoilers:** up to and including season 3, episode 4 _Popilikia_
> 
>  **Author's Notes:**  
>  \- Unbeta'd, all errors are my own.  
> \- This is my very first Five-0 fic, all feedbacks are treasured.  
> \- Because [stellarmeadow](http://archiveofourown.org/users/stellarmeadow) wants a McDanno coming together fic that more or less aligns with current canon but I don't feel like expanding the angst bunny I showed her. And then this materializes my head.

Billy Selway was his best friend.

The devastation Danny had felt all those years ago, he chalked it up to being young and coming to face death up close for the first time. People had asked him about it, friends at school and various adults, but he refused to talk about it to anybody. The memories and the emotions he put into a heavily locked box and hid away in his mind.

For years, he succeeded in avoiding to think much about it. But nothing stayed hidden forever. A buddy of his from the Police Academy getting killed in the line of duty dragged up the locked box and blasted it open. Finally, he had to examine his feelings and the revelation startled him.

Billy was a little more than just best friend to him.

Now, Danny was a modern man. He had no issue in accepting his attraction to another male. The not freaking out part was however freaking him out, a little. He, after all, had only gotten married not a year before. Not that he needed to reexamine his marriage, but he would prefer to have all the facts before making a life-long commitment like that. And if he went home that night and put two hundred percents of effort into making love with his wife, it was only because he was grateful to be alive.

. . . . . .

Being married didn't mean Danny was dead. He still looked, discreetly. And he took pride in the fact that he did nothing more than a slightly extended glance. He most certainly did not stare because it was rude, and he was raised better than to ogling after the opposite sex like meat. Okay, now the same sex too since he had realized he could be attracted to men as well.

It was rather interesting to find that none of the men he looked at appealed to him. Yes, many of them were considered good looking by most. Yes, Danny too found a few of them attractive, objectively speaking. But finding them attractive didn't equal find them appealing, at least in his opinions. So maybe it would take more than physical attributes in a man to get to him.

Danny might feel a little proud that he wasn't shallow like that.

. . . . . .

Steve was irritating of a man.

The fearless antics, the impaired interpersonal skills and the inability of keeping out of his personal business notwithstanding, Danny thought of Steve as his best friend. Danny hadn't had one in a long time and finding one in Steve was probably last thing he would have imagined, given the way they met.

Sometimes simply having Steve as a friend made Danny question whether he was a bit masochistic himself. Yes, he ranted withholding nothing, usually. And yes, the blame of bodily harm he experienced or would have experienced was justifiably placed on Steve. Steve snarled back, sometimes. But it didn't escape Danny that he had been a little bit too mean lately. It was merely a manifestation of the stress caused by the recent round of legal battle with Rachel. Infuriating he might be, Steve didn't really deserve to be Danny's punching bag no matter the cause. Especially when Steve was showing Danny a great deal of patience even if he's got his very own _Mommy Dearest_ to think about.

Maybe two six-packs of Longboards with a pineapple and ham pizza would be a good substitute of verbal apology. Danny balked at his own idea. It was a show of goodwill and self-punishment. Steve would love the sight of Danny eating a slice with fruit on it and no doubt giving him grief about it for months to come.

It would be more than enough of an apology.

. . . . . .

Out of character as it might be, Danny actually rang the doorbell instead of simply walking in like he always did. Manners were important when delivering an apology. Steve should've heard the Camaro pulling up without the doorbell anyway. Unless he was having an evening swim or in the shower. Or he was having sex with Catherine.

Danny shuddered at the thought of that.

He shouldn't be thinking about his partner having sex, and definitely not with Catherine. Danny liked Catherine. Not having gone through SEAL school seemed to retain her ability of proper civilized human interaction, in his opinions. The fact that she seemed smart, capable and not to mention sizzling hot in jeans only proved to him being in the Navy not necessarily made a person a risk-taker. Unlike a certain crazy SEAL he knew. But thoughts of Steve, having sex, with Catherine, definitely belonged to the no-go territory.

Steve's hip. The veins. The barely visible strains of hair.

Such were flashes of images inappropriate to have while waiting on Steve's doorsteps. Shaking his head, Danny tried to expel the images from his mind and replace them with other thoughts, like if he should ring the doorbell again.

Billy's story. The slightly sunburnt skin. The pattern of the rope etched onto Steve's shoulder.

Danny had no idea why he brought up Billy. He could've easily said it was a very good friend who drowned and made him hate the water and Steve would've stopped badgering for more. But instead, Danny went into details like he wanted Steve to know everything about where his distaste of the open ocean came from. He hadn't told anyone about that for a long time - not Rachel, not Gabby and most obviously not Grace even that would no doubt keep her out of the water like he would prefer. No, Grace did not need to be scarred for life. And the simple _I'm sorry, man_ told him Steve understood Danny's grief, without a doubt.

Billy drowning. Tiger shark in the water. Steve. _Oh shit!_

There was a towel draping over a shoulder when Steve finally opened the door. His hair was damp. Shower it was, probably.

"You rang the bell." Incredulous and a little annoyed. "You don't ring the bell."

Still stunned by his latest revelation, Danny's words weren't coming to his rescue just yet. So he shrugged and shouldered his way into the house heading for the kitchen. When Steve caught up with him inside, Danny had a comeback ready. "I'm trying to teach by example, so you can learn how normal decent people behave in our civilized society."

The face that greeted Danny as Steve sat down across the table was best described as three-tenths of Aneurysm Face with Military Blank filling the rest. Mix and match facial expressions were new, showing an old dog could indeed learn new tricks. The face's existence was short-lived though, the trademark goofy grin with a touch of smug satisfaction replaced it when Danny flipped open the pizza box.

"Pineapple and ham, the whole pizza." Stating the obvious, Steve scrutinized Danny. He seemed to have found what he needed after a moment, "Your apology is accepted."

"What apology?" Danny could swear he wasn't trying to be difficult but the idea of Steve could read him so easily was kind of unsettling. And if he was honest, sort of gratifying as well.

The grin only grew bigger. "Doesn't matter. We're good."

Danny had to wonder if Steve really knew what he was apologizing for.

. . . . . .

Pineapple and ham on a pizza wasn't supposed to be good, or anywhere even close to being decent. He was wrong.

Normally, Danny regarded himself big enough a man to admit being in the wrong. This instance though, it would happen after... never. Him actually eating such a pizza was ammunition enough to Steve and he absolutely didn't need more. Even if it was only Danny admitting it wasn't as awful as he thought.

"Hey, when you're done, grab me another beer," Danny raised his voice for Steve's benefit as he insisted cleaning up the two plates while Danny excused himself to the living room. "Please?"

There was no answer but moments later Steve joined him on the couch handing him another cold beer. Like many times before this, they settled down relaxing with Danny channel-surfing and Steve letting him without complaints.

"I think there's a football game on. Louisiana Tech playing some other team." Steve mused.

Nodding absentmindedly, Danny tried to find the sports channel while unhurriedly sipping his beer. "So where's your mom anyway?"

"Not sure." Danny could feel Steve shrugging in response. "Said she had something to do and left."

Danny stopped and looked over at Steve once he found ESPN. Steve's eyes might be on the flatscreen but his attention was clearly elsewhere, likely thinking about his mother. If Danny were Steve, he would say the mission tonight was to relax. Obviously mentioning his mother was the opposite way to achieving the goal. Danny needed a new topic to talk about, fast.

"How about your girlfriend?" This might not be the best choice of things to ask about, but it's the first thing that came into mind. Subconsciously Danny knew he brought Catherine up, in Steve's terminology, to gather intel on the enemy. She was almost a friend. Though it was a different story now that Danny wanted her man for himself. Not that he would ever do anything to jeopardize Steve's proclaimed non-relationship with Catherine, information was already good to have.

"Out clubbing," Steve took a long swig of his beer, "Kono felt like dancing and Cath went with her. Besides, she isn't very keen on being around when Doris is here. And I say it again, she's not my girlfriend."

Setting down his quickly emptied beer without taking his eyes off of Steve, Danny pondered. Steve's reluctance to define the _thing_ he and Catherine had was most definitely intriguing. He had to firmly remind himself that even if there was no Steve and Catherine, it didn't mean he would have any chance. The wise thing to do was to not get his hopes up.

"I'm sure lots of guys will be glad to know you've relinquished your right to be the boyfriend. Don't think you're gonna find a better girl though." Danny wanted to sound slightly sarcastic, but he knew some of his hopes uncontrollably slipped into his tone. Perhaps it was the minute change in his tone, Steven redirected his attention from the television towards him.

"Cath's great," Steve tipped his head slightly in agreement. "But I don't want a serious relationship with her." Averting his eyes briefly to the empty beer bottles on the coffee table, he continued when his gaze returned to Danny, "I need someone who'll call me on my shit, open my eyes to see things in different ways than the military one, back me up even if they don't agree with me, and willing to work on building a family."

Maybe it's wishful thinking, Danny thought Steve's describing him. But that thought was dismissed almost as soon as it came up. Lieutenant Commander SuperSEAL could not be into men no matter what some people might think sailors do to one another on ships weeks away from land.

"Yes, Danno. I'm talking about you." The shit-eating grin featuring on Steve's face was almost bashful.

"Umm... huh?" Danny's mouth dropped open slightly in shock. He imagined he was doing a damn good impression of a gasping fish on dry land.

His brain froze. Or maybe it was working into a frenzy trying to decide whether Steve was joking. He wouldn't be surprised if it was all a dream. Only a couple of hours earlier he had just realized he was attracted to his partner. Now the person of his desire was declaring the feeling was mutual? Reality just did not work that way.

Steve took advantages of Danny's distracted state. Deftly he slid across the short distance between them and pressed a kiss onto Danny. It was chaste and undemanding. One of his hands rest on the back of the couch while the other landed softly on Danny's knee. Danny's lips were parted but Steve didn't attempt to move in unresisted. Instead he gently pulled on Danny's lower lip and slowly pulled away. Their faces were barely an inch apart as he released Danny's lip and let out a happy sigh.

"It's everything I've dreamed of, and more." Danny felt the words whispered onto his lips.

And then Steve slid back to his side of the couch as if he had never moved. While Danny was trying to get his wits together to maybe respond to the kiss, Steve was eyeing him with a satisfied smile plastered on his face like he'd just gotten laid.

Danny cursed at himself mentally. He was no teenage girl. A chaste kiss like that should not have the power to rob him of his words. He wanted to say something, like reprimanding Steve for the stealth attack of the lips, maybe. What he got out eventually, wasn't at all what he intended to say. "You call that a kiss? Sure you can do better than that." Apparently, his brain and his mouth had a temporary disconnect.

It came out like a challenge and Danny knew Steve loved challenges. Rather than moving in for another kiss, Steve's smile grew bigger as he drawled out, "I assure you I can do much better, Danno. But I've waited for almost two years, I can wait a little longer."

"Two year? You waited two years? Why the hell did you not say something?" So it seemed his capability to rant did not required the participation of his brain.

Steve just shrugged languidly. "Waiting for you to catch up on it. I can be very patient. And you're worth waiting for."

"And why tonight?"

"'Cause you looked at me differently earlier and I knew you have it figured out," Steve laughed quietly, extending his long arm to give Danny's shoulder a firm squeeze. "Now we're on the same page, I'll call off the thing with Catherine first thing tomorrow. We'll have a proper date, without the interruptions."

A proper date? Who knew Steve was an old-fashioned closeted romantic? Danny figured Steve would simply club him over the head and carry him over the shoulder to the bedroom. A courtship was the last thing he would expected from the Neanderthal.

"Interruptions?"

Danny was sure it was not the lighting that made Steve look flushed when he answered, "You know, like, surfing, hiking and fishing?"

"Oh..."

From Rachel rear-ending his patrol car to Steve arranging secret dates, Danny realized he was rather clueless. But honestly, he was superbly fine with this. Besides, Danny was more interested to see the look on Doris' face when she found out which cow Steve would be getting his milk from.

Oh wait... He did not just call himself a cow. Damnit!


End file.
